Queenstown or "The biggest swingers in the world!"

I am not known for being the most "athletic" or "lithe" of people.  "Accident prone"...."clumsy"....."mal-co-ordinated", would be adjectives that, whilst perhaps a little harsh, would be completely fair.  So in choosing Queenstown as a major stop along our journey through NZ you could accuse us of being a trifle reckless.

On the other hand, Julia IS an athlete and anyone that knows us knows that our whole RTW trip has been planned on activities likely to induce an adrenalin spike.  Queenstown, being pretty much the capital of the adrenalin spike, was always going to be on the agenda.  The unfortunate thing about the town, is in becoming the Capital of Adrenalin, it also seems to have lost any identity as a town or community.

Is that a problem?  Not really.  If you're after anything other than fun and recklessness then you really are in the wrong place.  Head over to Arrowtown if you want a quaint, community feel.  Queenstown is where you go to lose a limb and/or half your liver, but definitely most of your wallet!

Switchbacks Galore in the Crown Range

The drive from Wanaka to Queenstown over the Crown Range was breath-taking, in that almost tediously NZ way.  Long, winding roads ascending the valleys between the mountains on the Wanaka side, then steep and treacherous switch-backs most of the way down the Queenstown side; all the time with the incredible backdrop of the mountains and lakes.

On the Swinger Bus

In true Queenstown style, we didn't even manage to get to Queenstown before we tackled our first challenge....the Nevis Swing.  A"Swing" is where you are attached to a harness and cradle, then swung out over a canyon.  The Nevis Swing is the biggest (in terms of arc, at 300m) and highest (160m) in the world.  After the disappointment of not being able to canyon in Wanaka, we wanted to try something out and this seemed to be the easiest option at the last minute.  So we drove up to the HQ, signed in, paid up and were driven out to the Swing Site.

It looks ridiculous here.....in real life it's even worse!

 The gantry reminded me of something in a James Bond film; a metal structure super-imposed onto nature's grandeur to satisfy the adrenalin lust of humanity.  Quality!  At this point it's worth recognising one of Julia's phobias....walking across grating.  In fact, walking across anything with holes in it is something of a challenge, so Julia really had to "man-up" before she even got to the gantry!

Check out the worry on her face

Just in case the last photo didn't convince you she was scared :)

Dangling at least 200m over the
valley floor

The guy doing the swing before us was doing it upside down and backwards (i.e. facing us when he left), but I don't think Julia would have gone for that, so we were going to do a tandem swing.  Oh my God what a feeling.  From the moment the trigger is pulled to the first upwards part of the swing your stomach and pretty much everything else south of your neck is trying to get inside your mouth.

Yes, that IS us and Yes, our guts WERE in our mouths!

Here's a little video of our experience.  For everyone other than our mothers, enjoy.....for our mothers.....don't worry, we're still alive!  Proof here and now that we're the biggest swingers in the world ;)

After this we were buzzing on adrenalin.  Julia felt a lot more confident about heights and suddenly a bungy jump was an option for her, but unfortunately we didn't do one there.  Looking back, perhaps we should have done, but we still have a long way to go around the world and I am sure the opportunity will arise again :)

She felt a lot better walking back to base

The views from the Swinger HQ were, surprise surprise, wonderful

On an adrenalin rush home

Once we'd finally made it into Queenstown, visited all 3 camp-sites and decided on the one for us, we parked up and exhaled.  We'd be here for 4 WHOLE DAYS!!!  Sorry for the multiple exclamation marks, very poor style, but the prospect of spending 4 days in the same place, being able to relax and simply catch up with ourselves, well that's worth acknowledging.  Plus of course there were all the activities we planned on doing.

Salon Saroian, Queenstown Branch

Behind us rose the steep hill up which goes the Queenstown Gondola, up to the skyline restaurant and in front of us was central town and the lake...a pretty sweet spot all things considered and we quickly settled in.

That first night we decided to head into town and have some fun.....and I think we executed on this fairly well.  Of course, we started off slow and fully intended to be back after a couple of swift ones.  As we all know though, the drinking Gods hate a wimp and the road to hell is paved with good intentions.

At one point we were sat around a log fire outside, talking to a bunch of randoms, drinking cocktails and feeling very happy with ourselves.  Julia met a young German girl called Chantal and the 3 of us went on a bar crawl until the early hours.  Finally stopping at the famed Fergburger for a late night cheeseburger, we arrived home to our little Babette at just gone 2.30am.  Good work.

Chantal

The next morning was a bit of a right off for some of us (Julia).....so we eased into the day until we heard a little tap at the door.  Chantal had remembered the offer of a free haar-schnitt and so Julia was put to work.  First up I got my monkey fuzz and Captain Ahab beard trimmed, then I was on laundry and BBQ duty.  Whilst Julia beautified Chantal, I BBQed a load of wurst and we sat there in the beautiful sunshine, eating our body weight in animal protein and drinking beer and prosecco.  A great way to deal with a Sunday hangover.

Wasp in my beer....I mean come ON!

Chantal headed off and we carried on relaxing in the sun, then moved indoors as it got colder.  That evening we had grilled tandoori chicken salad (home made) and as we looked on at other campervans that were not so well appointed we felt another flush of pride with our Babette (I say pride.....there was a hint of sadness that not everyone could be so comfortable).


The next day was a day of rafting and jet boating on the Shotover Canyon.  We'd heard great things about this and were really looking forward to our first rafting trip.  NZ had so far bombed out on us big time in the rafting stakes and so it felt good to finally be getting onto a trip.

We kicked off with the JetBoat and that was great fun.  It's hardly the most strenuous activity, nor the most dangerous at first sight.  However, when you consider the boat is travelling at 50mph/80kph over 30/40cm of water through a canyon that can't be more than 15m wide in places, then you certainly feel some respect for the skills of the driver.  Here's a little video of some of the ride.

A 0 roll drop, which means you don't roll down, you drop down

Straight after this we were off to the rafting trip.  After getting all dressed up in the sweet smelling wetsuits (heavy irony there) we boarded our bus and began what was a pretty hairy journey up into the mountain passes above Queenstown.  Some of the views to either side of our bus were chilling and there was more than one person on the bus that had the onset of panic attacks as we crossed the mountain range.  We learned a lot about how the area had begun as a gold mining town, with the Shotover being the second largest gold bearing river in the world (unverified by me......just passing on what we were told).  The road we were travelling on had been built by the gold-diggers (images of Hollywood wives with pick-axes!) so that they could transport in heavier machinery to mine more gold.  Thinking of how hard these men must have been made me shudder; this place is remote, the terrain is undeniably tough and I can only imagine the most bloody minded people surviving.

Queenstown lake and I

Once we'd dropped down into the starting point we were split into our teams and we set off.  The river at the beginning was fairly tame, then we realised that actually the majority of it was going to be fairly tame and the disappointment set in.  Though advertised as Grade 5 it turns out that the Shotover is very rarely at full flow (we learned this later on) and frequently is a technical Grade 3.  Technical because with such limited flow the pilots have to be very good at directing the raft down the correct course.  We've distilled our trip down to the very short clip below....bear in mind it was a 2 hour trip and this is what we came out with...ho hum!

(Editors Note:  having tried our best to put together something remotely interesting.....we canned it.  The video was amusing at double speed, but not really worth it!)

On the flip-side the views and scenery were magnificent and being able to float down the river was certainly a joy.  We saw herd after herd of mountain goats and clearly that made ME smile from ear to ear.  It's quite something to be on a river, floating along in a raft and to be able to smell the animals a few hundred metres before you even see them!

After the rafting we were driven back to town and we headed back to another quiet night in with Babette.  The joy of staying in the same place and not having to plan the next day was great.  Tomorrow we were to try river sledging....basically a boogie board with handles that you use to surf, lying down and head first down Class 3 rapids!  Nuts.

But it wasn't to be :(   Once again we were thwarted.  This time, the company claimed that they hadn't received our booking (which I did on the phone) and weren't even running the trip!  ARGH!  So we went for a quiet walk through town and a trip to the lake, before heading back to relax in Babette and plan our next moves.  Today was our last day in Queenstown, so we treated ourselves and went out for dinner.  Tonight it was to be Winnie's....a "gourmet pizza restaurant".

A happy Julia is a Julia facetiming with her family.....

In fairness, my pizza could have been better with a normal base (I gave moral support to Julia and joined her in a gluten free base).....but nothing could have made up for the cardboard pepperoni, low-fat cheese and tasteless tomato sauce.  The real blow was Queenstown's final raid on our wallets, when Julia added tomato sauce to her cheesy bread, an $11 dish became $30.  We've been told it's not the end of the world and we would never claim it was...but honestly.....f*ck you Winnies!

.....or snoozing away in the afternoon

Julia quickly escaped the radius of my seething wrath and went outside for a cigarette whilst I gave the manager a broadside.  Still seething we left for our beloved Babette and a welcome cognac outside under the stars before heading to bed.

Next morning we were to drive to Doubtful Sound for an overnight cruise and we were very excited :)